So ya I slept in and stayed in bed and stayed in bed some
more. For a couple of reasons, one I just didn't want to get up and knew I had
nothing to do today, and two my back has been fricken killing even more since
the magical needle of cortisone...
I did do laundry today, so it wasn't a complete waste. J We
even had leftovers for supper. It was that lazy of a day. Damn I wish I had the
'ability' (can't think of a good word) to go out and do things. This fear thing
is really screwing with me. I noticed driving to and from and even during the
movie yesterday that I kept having mini panic attacks. I could find no rhyme or
reason for them, but they kept happening. They were horrible. The ones in the
theatre I just tried to breathe through, the ones in the car I thought I was
going to have to pull over - but I got through them. I just wish I knew where
the anxiety is coming from, and how to get rid of it. It's less than awesome to
finally be in a good mood, with no suicidal thoughts, but be unable to go do
stuff - enjoy some living...
Not sure if I am seeing my daughter tomorrow or not, I
haven't heard back from her - but if I do we will probably do brunch before she
goes back home. Then I was going to do an errand for a friend, and then back to
the safety of my home. Oh the joy of being such a boring person...
Talk to y'all tomorrow...
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